We're like a lot better than the average bears
we just made rock paper scissors into a drinking game
yea, the bartender wouldn't serve you because you kept asking for "a slice of beer"
Dude, you walked in on me 5 times each times you had a different person with you. And each time you lifted the covers up and said 'whats going on in here'
you made sure you came back for your bottle of vodka but didn't remember to take your shoes
Why do you think it's a no-pants party?
Invite says "dress to impress". Her fault for leaving it open to interpretation.
Do you have any puffy paint? I want to put "fiesta muthafuckas" on my sombrero but its too much to bedazzle.
New Mean Girls drinking game: Everytime someone says Africa or Math, chug.
I also point out to everyone that she looks like DJ's gf on Roseanne.
And as the acid sets in, he looks back at the shallow form he used to call his and whispers "3 pee pees strong"
Who the fuck is "nick from the beach last year"
No idea hahaha...why?
He just texted me.. Should I ask where I met him?
he made that chewbacca noise when he came. like father like son i guess.
This conversation went from me banging other women's husbands to learning about baked goods. If that isn't personal growth I don't know what is.
Did you just correct my spelling of a made up word?
No, I just was using your word in plural form
A true gentleman never tells. But yes, I did indeed get laid last night
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