Come back if u want to. I'll do some dirty shit to u mamacita.
im about as happy as oj after his trial
I knew we were gonna fuck after she told me she's seen that Porno before
Just snuck alcohol into the hospital for my mom.
Well, a cop just pulled up. This could go either way.
you riverdanced for the cops while the rest ran away.
We fucked in my trunk while on the clock....what did you do at work today?
You were telling me last night 101 proof was nothing and you needed 400 proof or better yet military or marine proof, because you're marine grade.... You rascal.
I'm puking in a turkey pan....
When you're awkward as a teenager, it never goes away. You just mask it. With makeup. And boobs.
Body shots with my MILFs MILF!!
All I did was send my mom an ecard
My roommate walked in naked grabbed my hand and pulled me into her room to see her randoms dick.
Well I've consulted some psychics but they keep saying all they hear in my head is screaming and all they see in my future is pool noodles and cheese dip?
Dude, my vagina feels like new again! I love antibiotics. How's your day?
However many condoms you have, it isn't enough.
So my dad just asked, "did you leave without pants a lil bit ago?"
Randomize
