he just spelled fiance, "pheancie". I dont think he's ready to get married.
I think call of duty has replaced my masturbating. And I'm alright with that.
getting kicked in the face by someone doing a keg stand. just my luck
She got a digital picture frame for her birthday. FINALLY - a place for me to sneak all those penis shots I've taken with my iPhone.
You slammed your forties down on the table and yelled "I AM EDWARD FORTYHANDS" then mumbled something about repping Idaho like a champ and laid down on the couch.
I can't blame him for thinking that then, placing a cone shaped potato chip on the tip of his penis post bj is not a normal act of love
6 pack came off in the shower. Sharpie is not forever.
Like he held up the condom afterwards, twirled it with his finger, and said "look at that load"
Judging by the ckaw marks on my back i'm gonna go out on a limb and say that blonde chick was a werewolf. A sexy, kinky werewolf.
I am in serious pain and you're making dick jokes. I hope you wind up with crotch rot.
Hold on, I'm taking nudes in a blanket fort right now
She can be as judgemental as she wants. But she thinks the female orgasm is a myth so who is really winning here...
I made out with that lesbian chick for a blunt. NO REGRETS.
I think him and kristen are pretty serious now.. I dont think he cheats on her, anymore.
This morning we had sex while he was wearing a full length fur jacket and sunglasses... I wasn't even phased
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