we're blogging at a bar
Yep, it's a dick on our front door. Intentional?
Id settle for living inside the pirates of the carribean ride.
if I was a wizard from waverly place we wouldn't b having these problems
u know how some weekends you just wanna go out and ruin a relationship? this is one of those weekends
i just won "most creative" category in the condom contest in human sexuality by licking it onto a cucumber. my feedback forms included three phone numbers, one with a Magnum XL taped to it
Can you bring home an IV stand and an empty bag so I can direct inject coffee for work tomorrow morning?
RAAAAAAAAWWWWRRRRRR
THATS ME HOWLING MY ENJOYMENT OF THE THINGS WE CAN DO WHILE GETTING DRUNK
His dick isn't even good enough to be this much of an asshole
The boob job was worth every penny just to see the expression of pure joy on his face the first time he saw them.
On a scale of 1-10 I’m at biblical violence
She came home, put on the news, left a 20 minute drunk message on her friends machine, then proceeded to play back the entire message laughing hysterically and then just passed out
i could have got laid, but instead, i threw up in her hair. you can cross that off the bucket list.
Stereotypically, lax bros last the longest, but have huge egos that are annoying. Baseball players barely last 10mins, but are really nice. And than we have soccer players, last long and have no egos. Me and my friends have collected our findings.
We've been together for 10 months. These next 2 may be a deal breaker. He has not met the summertime version of me that is so hungover today that I cancelled a meeting with my boss right after she sent me an appreciation note saying I have great work ethic. I have her fooled.
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