dude, you're never picky with who you hook up with, have a little dignity
nah man, chicks are like pokemon, gotta catch \'em all
Guy at red light looking at porn. I'm waiting for him to look over at me so I can shake my head and he can feel bad
No, I'm never going to get a job bc I don't know anything about public relations except that Chris Crocker wants everyone to leave Britney alone.
He washed my hair whilst I gave him head in the shower. Bored or gay?
Most fantastic sex ever until her Doberman took an interest in what we were doing. There was nothing more terrifying then feeling warm dog breath on my ballsack.
I can't even teach it... It's just natural slutyness.. My mom has it too
he was holding his dick in one hand and my boob in the other and i looked down and thought, this is my life
Dude I'm looking through my old high school year book and I circled every girl I fucked.. what was wrong with me.
Who is he, asking me if im dtf without a question mark
...
OK am i seriously the only one who thinks Cocaine Tuesdays is a bad idea?
Just purchased ketchup, body wash, and lube. Hope you're ready for the post-memorial-day-cookout-shower-anal.
I have to sanitize my nipples and its just to cold in here for it to be ok
I just bottomed with the last unicorn playing in the background. I've hit a new level of gay.
Are you going to regret this?
No I do t think so
Ok then he can enter the holy dorm temple.
we have beer and we're watching the birds have sex in our yard.
Randomize
