do you think they make care bear costumes for cats?
Don't be a dummy cum on the tummy. Make her a slut, and cum in her butt. Have no fear, jizz in her ear. Don't be a noob, cum on her boob. Forget her rack, blow on her back. Just take off your coat and jizz in her throat. And if she seals off her holes, cum in her rolls
is that a poem?!
I glued a penny on the door Tricia believes its Patrick Swayze haunting our apartment. Fuckin potheads.
he has a knack for choosing the worst time to masturbate
That's why I don't chug things. Because when I was a freshman in college tequila came out my nose.
You know those creepy dolls that look like they are watching you from anywhere in the room? It was like that, but with his penis...
Please be advised that because of last year's "incident" we will no be starting St. Pat's day with spicy breakfast burritos and car bombs. Please plan accordingly.
I think I'm in love. He's everything I ever wanted for myself, just with a lot more drugs.
Also I just had a flash back ... He told me I have nice nipples and then asked me about yours..
It's like weed even makes my glasses better. Everything is so bright and clear and beautiful!
Just make it a game! Like 20 questions STD style.
Dude fuck drugs. It's 4am and I'm eating mushroom ravioli fantasizing about jumping on a trampoline
That's really the only reason I'm dating you, the prospect that I might get bacon
He literally said, while inside me, "I would smack your ass but I don't want to wake my mom up". Amazing.
So... he's my second cousin's step-bro... To do or not to do?
Randomize
