You would DIE at the bar we're at right now. All indian/asian med students, I swear
Asian doctor ratio. So hot. I would've gone into heat
She got kicked off the plane and spent the last four hours in a holding cell with the feds.
but she's really nice
I found the orange juice, it was hiding in the vodka...trickster.
The girl in the car behind me just took a bowl hit. I miss college.
i just had to hear from a third party that he came inside of me
Spent the entire ride home from downtown trying to convince designated dawgs to drop us off at waffle house instead of our apartment. i told them it was my house...they didn't buy it.
This is all my moms fault. She shouldn't have encouraged my weird fascinations as a child
Just witnessed my roommate pick her nose and eat it in her sleep. Remember, you made out with that.
Champagne pong turned into an expensive and painful experience.
so I found out I could dislocate my shoulders on demand while I was trippin on e last night...
it will be just like last year but no clogged toilets and more costumes.
You have talents. You got me laid two weekends in a row in two different cities.
Every person I've ever had sex with is in Chipotle right now.
Is it weird that I have your number saved in my phone as baby Jesus?
Last night was fun but it wasn't right. I will say that our lives intersected for a brief and intense moment and we will just leave it there.
Randomize
