I boned her and wore a Freddy mask once. It was pretty lol
Yeah. He most definitely jizzed himself in the face.
I guess what I'm trying to say is you've fucked more people than the economy.
I just woke up with streamers wrapped around me. Glitter in my hair. My fish are swimming in empty bottles of Barcardi. Helpppp
he's legally blind and likes the sound of my voice, good enough for me.
I took both his daughters virginities. There's no way he won't give me a job
There are about 5 pictures of my dog taking a dump on my camera and 20 of Brandon taking one for "comparison" reasons.
please dont make me drink to the titanic soundtrack
I just realized how early it is, you're taking this booty call thing to a whole other level. also, there are altoids all over my room, that was weird
She was kinda cute. So long as you don't mind neck tattoos and bad life choices.
I thought he was walking around the front. I just hit and run my booty call. I'm the worst non girlfriend ever
i think you lost all your innocence when you were caught straddling a fence in your thong & cowboy boots by the 40 year old apartment manager
Visiting Houston was a good decision for my penis.
This guy on the tube is sooooooo high. Eyes are bloodshot and he's licking his headphone cords.
I only gave you one rule about using the beach house: don’t get cum on anything!
You’ve seen my tits! You had to know that rule was unrealistic! Does it help that he was really cute?
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