Doo rag and shades in the bar. You are missing your future husband.
okay serious question, the water is shut off in your house, do you attempt and use the clean toilet water for your new bong?
Just went to my life planning class. The professor has a braid going halfway down his back and an earring.
he just told me he'd rather go to the pirates game. i know it was desperate but i said id give him roadhead if he let me come along.
And nobody saved him?? That chick had like three teeth TOPS
Going stoned out of mind to my sociology exam because it's really just a pizza party. I love community college.
So the bartender tried kicking me out but i screamed im an RA you cant kick me out
Did your surprise acid trip turn out well?
The best part of Easter was watching all his colorblind cousins try to find the eggs.
Well its all fun and games until you get naked with your ex in the shower. that's NOT flirting
No it's like. I don't respect you. And I think you're a terrible person but. I still wanna bone it out.
I'm the kind of gay who carries his anxiety medication in case the club scene gets too fierce
I am afraid of asking him for his new number so I continue to text the one that's no longer in service.
i black out too much to be "responsible"
Best news I’ve heard all day. Cookies and dick. What more could a girl ask for?
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