Pussy?
how
Wat do u mean how?
i don't know her name but she is cooking me brkfst then helpin me find my car.
she hot?
i don't wanna talk about it
If I was Danny Tanner and my wife died and left me with three kids I would hire a nanny rather than bringing in the sexually promiscuos uncle with a fetish for leather and rebellion and my obviously mentally ill (possibly gay) best friend Joey, who has never had a girlfriend and consistently talks in cartoon voices... a nanny is just a better choice
So pretty much, I was trying to piece last night together and remembered a point where I was pointing to you heart then touching your face. I'm not sure that I ever translated that to "I like your personality better than your looks" but that's what I meant
Last night was so much fun. i kept trying to lick everyone
There is NOTHING better than watching a child being chased by an ostrich.
just saw a couple drunkenly stumble over to the family planning aisle of Walgreens. inspiring.
...She was shooting whiskey using a turkey baster...i was horrified.
I have a video (on my shattered iphone) of a random DJ at some bar giving me a birthday shoutout and texts from random numbers talking about birthday sex. My birthday is in April... Happy birthday to me?
Note to self: Don't go home with a recent divorcee. Semen and tears.
my roommate had a few special brownies and wrapped my purse and one of my shoes and left them under the tree for me...
I don't know bro. If a girl makes you cum hard enough that you pull a back muscle, she might be the perfect one to call for a massage on said muscle.
I'm pretty sure "good advice you would give to a freshman for achieving success" isn't constituted by introducing them to your addy dealer...
it is my civic duty to ensure the success of our youth.
I'm sorry I was just sleeping on the kitchen floor I'm too dead to think
These guys are just fucking with my heart instead of fucking me. They're fucking up.
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