Yes, one should always join a cult. At least once.
i effing cant stand that stupid soul the new way to roll hamster commercial. everyone im with is laughing and now hate them all.
is it mean to send ur x his condoms back because they are too small for ur new boyfriend?
Tomorrow will not be complet unless someone eats me out. Just sayin
The intern claims someone glued plastic eyeballs to his penis last night. He going to show everyone in the conference room at 3pm. There is a $5 cover charge.
Yikes. I usually have a 24-hour waiting period between sex partners. You know, like for a handgun.
Party Liz is going to have to have her wings clipped until someone gets me some baby reins to wear
THIS CHICK IS LIKE SOME SORT OF HOOKER HOUDINI.
She really has to stop the coke at some point. Won't she run out of money eventually?
Won't she run out of nose eventually?
Anyway, all that to say that tiny penises are a hassle.
Sorry your girlfriend got you a valentines present and you forgot to get her one.
How long will your dick be dry?
now to finish some work and then i think i'll work out. or garden. or at the very least I'll continue eating frozen grapes and take more drugs
it's a rainbow of FUCK YOU
But I put cranberries and apples in my wine so it's festive drinking not suicidal drinking
Only I could dislocate my ribcage coaching volleyball and still want to get drunk tonight.
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