Christians are straight up FREAKS
i'm so high i feel like the people i'm chatting with online can some how see that i'm naked.
in retrospect, sexting while high was a mistake - I meant to say "I'll fuck you stupid, baby" but of course I said "I'll fuck your stupid baby"
Either way I should probably pregame on the plane
It was like a lincoln log. Seriously. I don't know who's more pissed, me or my vagina...worst.hookup.ever.
I honestly didn't see the problem playing beer pong In the car on the road trip home.
I pretty much have hash tequila and gelato for dinner every night
We're knee deep in HJ's right now.
Atlanta road trip update. Jimmy fell into the petting tank at the aquarium. And freaked out. With cops now... Keep you posted
if drunk means calling me and asking to borrow the game of life at 2am then I think you were drunk
I punched some guy in the face for being an asshole then later I went to say sorry and give him a hug and he started making out with me. How was your new years?
It was kicking off big time until you crawled out the bar on your hands and knees. Nobody wanted to mess with that.
Still stoned. I like your bong. It can stay. No others, though.
Does sweetest day count when you're spending it with your fuck buddy, high and eating Pizza Hut?
Lo siento on account of my penis...
Randomize
