We left the window open. My vibrators funeral is at 2ish.....bring a side dish or some shit.
hey you forgot your wet suit in my room you can come grab it whenever
You just kept yelling, "THAT'S THE POWER OF PINESOL, BABY!"
It's official. The summoning powers of my vagina are unmatched by anything in this world.
I think he just caught a duck in mid flight
Apparently "dick me" was not the response he was looking for.
Drunk yet?
Well I just did the worm on an empty dance floor while the bridesmaids were serving cake. You tell me.
Landen experienced Greenville for the first time last night. He was awaken by 2 cops and 4 EMS guys this morning in the bed of that truck that is for sale at the swashbuckler carwash, said he was trying to walk to waffle house... Greenville- 1, Landen- 0
She came out of my bathroom wearing nothing but high top Converse, a leather jacket and a tongue stud. I love rock bars.
We made out and he didn't grope me. I liked it. I felt like I was innocent again.
I do not love him. There is no love. Only sex and meatloaf.
he just fucked me for my cheese..
But on the bright side the arresting officer was just as hot as I remember and I took a pretty okay mugshot.
I woke up in the bathroom clutching a stuffed shark. My night was fantastic, thanks for asking.
I am now banned from the bar... Because you got head from my ex in the woman's restroom
Randomize
