Why are handjobs necessary in class?
.....so he has a son. Josh. That is not his roommate
Just saw a guy from Kansas and a guy from Nebraska arguing over who had less of an accent. God Bless the Midwest.
I just got hard thinking about a crunch wrap. Im done
She just kept screaming you name over and over. Im starting to think this is my alarm clock
have to get expensive furniture. after that study abroad now at least six things at ikea are named after guys i slept with
I just farted in the bathroom and the guy in the stall next to me started gagging. Its a beauitful day
Next time you think about divorce, consider this: a hot guy just walked in and I tried to suck in my back fat.
Oh my god there's only so much masturbating one can do before one wants to fucking cry
Dude. Going to the Theme park the day after the 4th of July was the worst idea I've ever had.
I have straight up perfected the art of amazing manicures with shaky-as-fuck adderall hands. Also, I'm way too proud of this.
Dressing as mugato from zoolander Halloween you may want to be the hand model. We can get you a fish bowl filled with Clementine Vodka and soda you can put your hand in.
I was sending him tit pics while watching how to train your dragon 2. It was everything.
Jesus Christ, it's not like going swimming. You don't have to wait 20 minutes after you eat to suck a dick
Right after i got done cumming i sat back and gave a big Ric Flair "WOOOOOO!"
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