woke up on the kitchen floor in the recovery position. at least drunk me remembered sober me's emt training
once you have herpes you dont really care what goes in your mouth anymore.
Also he wants to know a casual, consise way to ask a girl in a bar if he could eat her out. Think on that.
So in Aca Taco on grad night 1am, this bitch walks in alone drunk as fuck in her gown to the front of the line and says, "I graduated today...thank YOU"
you regret 100% of the tequila shots you do take. thats what gretzky meant to say
You just kept walking around in a circle saying "well played 6th street well played" before falling over.
The last thing I remember was naked hot tub and taking a shot and using the hot tub water as a chaser. Not acceptable.
You slept on a pillow of digiorno
I know but we're going to blackout city so it'll probably be warm there
I am more than mildly offended he didn't screenshot the snapchat of my boobs.
You didn't throw up on me, you threw up on yourself and then tried to give me a hug
I'm so glad I can be everyone's guide to the world of fucked up kinks
He said it only counts if it ends up on the internet
I threw up in my 8 AM. Morale is low.
It’s so white trash that I almost have to have it.
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