I just watched the Dark knight, Maggie Gylennhaal looks like Katie Holmes after a stroke
I wish i was in the wii world.
I hate thxgiving break now because that totally means I'm not able to have sex for a week.
I gave them both handjobs at the same time. Felt like I was skiing
This is random, but did i give u a handjob in the middle of the night or was that a dream?
We had to leave the bar because you were trying to show the bartender your boobs for water.
My ex was here I looked him in the eyes when I grabbed some other guy by his belt and dragged him to a room
Got drunk and tried to deep fry burritos. Turns out wild turkey isn't a good replacement for vegetable oil. Nearly burned my house down.
Sober people should be as daring as drunk people more often, because honestly the fact you’ve lived so long is a sign that anything is possible.
Lets start a coed nudist frat/sorority. It would be amazing. Or just an orgy club. It would also be amazing
Please send me a thumbs up pic afterwards. No homo. After you've redressed and are heading for the walk of shame out of course
Can we make sure camping doesn't turn into forest-orgy?
Lol, last year was UNREAL
she keeps dunkaroos and gatorade in her bed. yep pretty sure im in love.
Do me a favor and don't mention him I feel like Regina George and I just want to scream I made him
I laid naked in his bed as he brought me an ice cream sandwich so I would say everything worked out great
I guess you know it was a good night when you find your ripped underwear in your pocket, and a nerf bullet falls out of your pant leg 😂😂
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