Does it still count as a "walk of shame" if it's only 1am?
Just saw two guys having a lawn mower race, and their girlfriends cheering them on. Get me out of Tehachapi,
sometimes i just want to live alone. my roommate keeps looking at me weird like hes never seen a girl eat plain salt before
you dont have to exercise, you threw up last night!
I just snorted a line of adderall through a rolled up business card for the Michigan Law Admissions Office.... Tell me I'm not motivated
how are you gonna miss the world cup? other than the olympics it's our last way to assert our dominance over China after this economic bull shit
I would do laundry with you but I vaguely remember swallowing all my quarters last night as some kind of trick.
All I remember is taking a bath, puking in the bath water numerous times while trying to wash myself and I must of eventually given up
well we could tame deer to let us ride on them. does that work?
Well at least you learned that cops don't like when you call them frenchy. Nice dive over the fence by the way.
Glow Paint looked great for the Black Light Party last night, Tonight having a glow in the dark Pizza on my arm, not so much.
Come on kid, foreplay is elementary stuff. It's a vagina, not a sphinx.
CUT OFF ALL YOUR HAIR COME ON MAN LET'S DO THIS
I just got the high sucked out of me. Fuck.
I’ve got a lot of questions but the first one has to be where you got the flame thrower.
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