TAKE DOWN THAT PHOTO OF ME IN THE NURSES COSTUME NOW.
:O -> O: ... that's emoticon for "he threw up in my mouth while we were making out"
I'm on strict orders from her to keep sleeping with you until you give her a job next summer.
They glued all of the ceiling tiles shut.
oh my god. you caused complete remodeling to a college campus that you don't even go to
They evidently had to pull his penis out of me while we were passed out on the floor.
I'm venturing to your corner of this sin house in t minus 2 minutes.
Where are you?! I require drunk, males and possibly crying. Vomiting is optional and/or optimal as is karaoke.
When Pony by ginuwine plays I pretty much just grind on the nearest penis.
I stopped hooking up with him and ran to the bathroom to throw up. He saw me throwing up and it made him throw up
He was only in jail for 4 hours before he was someone's prison wife
Because cocaine and lesbian hookups on a Tuesday cannot be the new normal
You do it and I'll burn these mermaid pants so help me God.
I just need to find someone whose kink is financial submission.
I am in no place to make rational decisions, but right now i want you inside me
Any chance he has an open marriage? That penis shouldn’t be wasted on one woman. It should be shared with all womankind, or at least me. I’m too good at sex to be deprived a penis that large
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