Dude, just walked by a homeless guy pissing on the sidewalk while he was screaming at his wang. God, I love this city.
Come to wood. Julia is putting pants on. We must stop her.
Just threw up at the table during our Father's Day dinner. And I managed to get quite a bit on dad, so that was nice.
can you take me to a tanning bed
sure, why though?
i have to go once so i can blame these herpes on the tanning bed and she won't get suspicious
we were pretty classy up until the second keg
he had his head down and said he was listening for the buffalo, he had to still be drunk.
He smells so good today
Seriously, back away from the sexual harrasment suit.
You picked a jagger girl up claimed her then walked out the door with her that was the last we saw of you
her dad gauges his nipple piercings.
Beer acquired. Food is cooking
Wow, you are almost sliding into home plate for some stellar fellatio
it's taken me 3 hours to eat this pudding cup. I think I am melting.
Actually, I take that back. You can only have it if I'm allowed to French braid the mullet.
You were silly, high, and chewing on things.
I'm sorry I keep having sex wth your friends. I'm done, for real. Unless cole is interested. Other than that, I'm done.
I swear it’s like he’s filling my soul via my vagina
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