You do realize the lyrics aren't "hold me close TONY DANZA" right?
You can't be serious.
vodka and carrot juice, if im gonna drink i at least got my 8 servings of vegetable
Either way I should probably pregame on the plane
Mass Text: Free blowjob to first person to bring me a nacho cheese chalupa.
I'm sitting on the patient chair, waiting for my vagina to be violated & "i don't want to miss a thing" has been playing on repeat. WHY IS THIS HAPPENING TO ME.
What do you think it is?
It's a boy. I know it. She always manages to have a cock inside her somehow.
You challenged yourself to walk backwards all the way to the bar... And you did
I need to make a new year's resolution to only pee in toilets. And it needs to start happening before the new year.
Is it socially acceptable to stop at the strip club for the lunch buffet on my way to the airport?
im sleeping with a therapist...so you can talk to me.
Guess who was PASSED OUT ON A BMW. I shit you not
Stop it right now
This time face forward
I didn't know your ex looked like a male Khloe Kardashian?
Last night was like blooper reel sex. He dropped me!!
You were dancing to the Bee Gees, at 3am, with a piece of ham on your head. Moral of the story, You can't drink.
I know right? It's like he knows how to pleasure me better than I do myself... He's like a prophet of sex
Randomize
