I even resorted to pole dancing with the street sign. I have an extra $20 now because I think people were paying me to leave.
we were having sex and the sweat made her make up run... seriously laid there and watched her face just melt into ugly.
Breakfast=the leftover margarita in my car. Have a great day.
I feel like I'm taking part in a surprise porno. At least my hair looked good.
No she stopped screaming. Now she's eating popcorn. Off a plate. With a spoon.
You were holding up a boot and yelling boot gang
I learned so much about myself in that shower.
Hurry there's four guys dressed up as a bachelorette party, one has a condom veil and the rest are selling candy bouquets and asking if anyone wants to get laid for $5
We had sex in the morning in pregnant lady position. Like fuck me like the hott piece of ass that I am, not your wife of 7 years.
His dick was so bent it was like fucking captain hook's hand for 2 hours
she told me she wanted to fuck me because i was "rugged". if the definition of rugged is a lack of manscaping, slightly overweight, and pounding 16 oz pbrs, then yes i am rugged as fuck
I'll be honest, I too would punch the 21 year old version of myself in the face, and then have rough sex with him.
wtf guys I thought we agreed on no more knives. So much for not destroying the house
What happened last night? I just woke up and there's like 15 mcflurry cups on the floor
You don't remember stealing them?
dont ever go to laser tag drunk. you will be judged.
Randomize
