Those kids are glorified dude-bros. It's banal.
so we were having anal, both very very drunk when he started shouting his roomates name
Just made a drug deal by throwing my money to my dealers window and receiving weed the same way. We are the definition of typical lazy stoners.
I wish i could put a picture of my ass of my resume...that seems to be the only way i will ever get hired
i spent 45 minuets spilling my heart out to him telling him i was in love with this other guy sorry. when i was done he asked me to give him a blow job. i did. i have commitment problems
Just coerced a Santa to buy me a handle. Tis the season.
We glued Jenga blocks together, called it "magic blocks" and sold it to the stoners for $50 and a bottle of Henny
This tent reeks of fear and sangria
Halfway through he got an idea for a short story so he wrote it in magic marker on my boobs. Yeah, he's a keeper.
A man bought two 40's from me, then asked if I had duct tape. How do people over 50 know about Edward 40hands? It was very weird.
I have my vibrator between my thighs and I'm listening to high school musical. That kind of high. We're all in this together.
I mean if you can't appreciate a good looking dick then just get out.
I definitely fucked a Trump supporter last night but I wouldn't let him fully admit it because then I would've had to leave and his cock and abs were too perfect
He asked me while we were fishing why the passion was gone when we have sex. It's official...I am the dude in this relationship.
i'll explain later but cookie monster is playing the xylophone
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