dude ... she has a full length mirror in her shower, don't even tell me shes not dtf
The most interesting things happen to you when your pants come down. I truly envy you.
The last thing I remember is trying to split my bridesmaid dress down the back like the incredible hulk.
and you succeeded.
i woke up to banging and pieces of ceiling falling on my face
He was having an allergic reaction to that new brand of vodka Eric brought, so he just started chasing with benadryl.. Talk about commitment.
What changed your mind?
Being sober
I texted him that I wanted to be more than fuck buddies so when I came over he gave me a punch card. He takes me I dinner every 10 fucks.
Joined a porch party below me by climbing out the window and jumping off the roof. Tonight will be good
Shower sex is an art that should not be attemted drunk
I'm about to take my 7th shot and I have to to go to dinner with my grandma in an half hour. What is my life.
This couch is so comfortable I can tell if it's like a waterbed or I pissed myself
I found more straws in my beard this morning. Please stop doing that.
I just paid my school fees like a real adult who doesn't get accidentally drunk on a Tuesday night
next time you go get food at three am and leave a rando here can you warn me??? Also i tazed him. but it was just my little one so i think he'll be fine. bring me some fries.
Or is it distressingly heterosexual?
Randomize
