I'm afraid that if I tell my sister I think Zachary Quinto is gay I'll have to put her on suicide watch for the next week or so
So apparently I told him I was off to go "whore skipping" and I disappeared into the night skipping down the street. I know this because there's video.
In attempts to Not be THAT GIRL in front of my new crush I will only drink a 12 pack instead of my normal case.
you ever get that eerie feeling when you walk in a room, when you know youve barfed here before.
She eyed me up from across the bar and mouthed "I have no gag reflex".
Just because he saw my boobs doesn't mean he knows me all of a sudden
OMG HE JUST PUKED WITH THE DOOR OPEN WHILE DRIVING ON THE ROAD AND OMG WE NEED TO CHAT BUT NOT ATM CAUSE THERES PUKE ON MY PHONE
Just invented taco cereal.
the point of no return was when you "drugged" his drink with glitter. face-planting on his dick was beyond.
Im in the bathtub drunk. Less than an hour before the interview. This will be the best or worst career move ever., support?
I've never seen a guy eye-fuck someone so hard in my entire life. I thought he would develop laser vision, bore holes into your body, and not even realize your innards would be spilling everywhere. That's how bad it was.
Now I'm obligated to stay and cuddle with her because the condom broke. Fuck.
Her mom is a nurse who got called in to declare someone dead. Just got wing manned by a corpse.
It makes me so happy that my local liquor store has a black lab that is there every day. Really tho - it makes the higher prices excusable.
I miss seeing you
i hope for the sake of your safety you were not with your girlfriend while sending texts like that at 3 am
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