O.A.R does not stand for Old Recycled Abortions.
I woke up on the side of the highway to the ppl in orange jumpsuits cleaning to comunity service. Not sure which freaked them out more... Finding a dead b ody or me not being dead
can you imagine how much money lesbians save on birth control?!?
bitches.
Hey. I found $5 in quarters from one of those state quarter collection books. I'm using it for food tomorrow.
Just learned how to deliver a baby.the things i saw tonight can never be unseen
No, i know about the eggs and penis, the oh wow was for the fire
the higher we get, the more he looks like ray charles.
It is 9pm, let the ass parade to the bars begin
There was this blissful moment of peace and quiet... then you ran past our window with a lit firecracker in hand going, "SHIT. SHIT. SHIT!"
I need an IV, a new head, and stronger morals.
Sigh. I'll find the right guy one day.
Prince charming is right around the corner and will be freaky as shit!
His baby mama found the pictures of us, she couldn't see my face but she could see my asshole. So I'm safe.
Dude how about today while I was on lunch someone died in the break room at work....I didn't even know we had a break room!!
You woke up at like 4 in the morning fell off your bunk bead, yelled at Nic for asking if you were ok, walked to the kitchen, pissed on the keg, and then looked at me and said "Still not worth it" then went back to bed.
I shit myself and fell down the stairs and I’m still finding shit In those pants.
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