do you think they make care bear costumes for cats?
Her eyes are really red like she jus got out of the hospital and shes coughing ...80 ppl at her school do have swine flu dude
So your saying just a blow job?
everytime she opens her mouth i wish that i was deaf
dude 8 am is too early to start pregaming for new years eve
clearly you are not from wisconsin
Someone tried to flush pizza down the toilet. Well, at least tried to
High enough to ask the woman at best buy if she ever feels like she's swimming. and telling the man outside that he smells like happy juice.
Within the hour, he sent me 8 texts and 4 voice memos. One of the memos was just him whistling for 3 minutes. ...It's official, I attract the crazies.
So I'm dropping a fat deuce at work, and the lock on the stall door slips and the door slides open, when suddenly someone comes in. Now I have two options, I can either get up quickly and try to shut the door quickly (not easy to do with one hand) or I can just sit there and play it off like it's no big deal and I always dump at work with the door open. I chose option two, and it was as awkward as it sounds.
Or maybe I'll just keep introducing myself like, hello, they call me iane because I need the D. Applications are submitted online, women need not apply.
When you get shitfaced you find strippers when I get shitfaced I speak to woodland creatures, do you see the dilema?
Double check your contract and see if it says anything about sleeping with your manager
Banged a guy with 2 broken arms once. Top that
Feels weird riding an elevator with my tongue in my own mouth.
Crazy homeless man drinking beer out of a vitamin water container on the bus just set me up on a date with the yuppie next to him
I apparently sent an offer letter to, and then subsequently onboarded, the wrong candidate. How's your Monday?
Randomize
