5 years of college and never once did they teach us how to respond when you overhear a group of 7th grade boys who are in your class talking about how you're definitely DTF
children are so perceptive these days... and horny
was i over the top when i said that i wished they made v-neck pants to her?
This bar receipt from last night makes no sense
You were wasted and got mad that it was too high so you subtracted 50 bucks in the tip line from the total
I wish that would've worked
you can't get genital warts from dogs can you?
You drank the expired grape juice because you were convinced it had fermented into wine...you have a problem.
if i remember New Year's Eve then there is something seriously wrong.
what am i going to do when LOST is over? What am i going to get high to?
He is going overseas for 8 months, not only was that blowjob a going away present, but i was supporting the troops
You tried taking his shirt off at the bar. He was 37 and married with kids.
screw it, I'll just be a stripper until next August when then are looking for suitable teachers to teach the future of America. it's like a feel good movie just a little out of order and im a dude.
I'm the brains and you're the boobs of this operation.
If those antibiotics mean you can't drink, ya might as well pack your bags and re-enroll next fall, because sobriety this week would be social suicide.
I just want to pat him on the head, bake him some cookies, and reassure him that, someday, he will get laid.
The Easter sex puns were too abundant
Yeah I passed out. The last thing I remember is the lady telling me I couldn't play the clarinet with my nose.
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