just realized i've hooked up with 3/4 of the guys here COOL
lol whn u cming hre I nd 2 c ur fce
IF YOU TEXT ME ONE MORE SHORTENED VERSION OF A WORD, THE ONLY THING YOU'LL SEE IS MY FIST IN YOUR FACE.
Dont you think its a little early in the relationship for sexting?
That explains waking up with one hand in the toilet and the other in the trash can
ya i found him eventually. hes the only one who drinks guiness so I just had to follow the darkest green puke trail
the recent google searches were "were can i buy a porn horse, why does my heart hurt after drinking, and orlando's teen night..." your thought process perplexes me
Blood drive hookups: you will probably faint during the sex, but at least you know neither of you has AIDS
I'm really not interested in hearing from him. Unless there is casual sex involved
I miss the "How many Grindr hits can I get while performing in an elementary school?" game.
i gave up on the vacation being fun the night i ate all the marshamallows out of the lucky charms while everyone else was having sex in the condo
My liver is whispering mean things about me to my kidneys. It's a fucking miracle I'm not hungover. Lol
Vodka Red Bull is like your spinach if you were Popeye
75% of the time I swipe right on Bumble for girls over 40 is because I think their 18 year old daughter is hot.
One of my nipples looks nothing like the other...i don't know how this happened
And he put his penis in my face and I back handed it away.
Randomize
