nut hugger
Yo I'm just eating dinner now. U ready to go out?
Ya ya. Where you eating?
Cereal and beer. U kno u want in.
Now that I've come to graduate college. I realized the only discernible skill I learned was how to roll a joint properly. go me.
Well thats $24,000 well spent.
My balls are so social today.
it was like one of those moments where the couple runs together and kisses and everyone in the airport claps. but instead of clapping an indian guy walked by and said 'ahhhright! get some!'
My parents showed me my IQ test from fourth grade, I'm shitting on my potential.
Great, now justin bieber is gonna sing a song about chile
i lnow ive slrrwsdy teted you this. but goddamn girl on tv is a good song
And we should impose a 'friends don't let friends order 25 shots at last call' rule
In the ER. 2nd degree burns. Drunken attempt to make gasoline scented candles.
he was alternating between taking bites of butter and bagel. he said it was easier than finding a knife
Also, I am ligit concerned that I might compulsively start collecting vibrators like Pokemon.
All i know if I'm throwing uo into a bag with a smiley facE on it right now and this is not a smileuy face time right nowe
Once he blows his load, he's more of an immediate flight risk than that jetBlue pilot. He's out the door before his cum is out of my vajayjay.
Last night I somehow got INCREDIBLY wasted & thought it was a good idea to make a group chat with all the guys I'm hooking up with and just say "bye." soo I'm hiding out till next week.
Randomize