I glued a penny on the door Tricia believes its Patrick Swayze haunting our apartment. Fuckin potheads.
People are suprisingly accepting of someone doing a walk of shame in a toga...
Because ur a stupid bitch
Actually, I'm graduating from college on Saturday so that makes me a well educated bitch.
been home a week and haven't blacked out yet. i miss college
Should study in library more often, procrasturbating is less of an option.
Mass texted booty calls to all the guys I've hooked up with this year to commemorate the end of the semester.
I watched her follow him out of the bar, chase him around the corner and literally throat punch him. It was awesome.
Im at that shitty point in my day where I start planning night activities while finger dipping vyvance off of my desk, you got any plans?
Hey start looking around for a low rider Subaru. Well get a loan. It will be capital for our first music video.
Fun holiday story for you: Alex and I went out drinking. She left. I needed a ride home. Met this dude and told him to drive my car back. Once at my house, I made him take out my dog and then apologized for not wanting to make out with him. I said, let me go see if my roommate is interested and then I slept in Alex's bed all night.
20 bucks says he was an actual leprechaun
His grandma held his dogs so they wouldn't follow me out the door. It was like a whole new level added to my walk of shame.
He said we would have a beautiful daughter together. That way too much for a one night stand...
He makes balloon animals that get you high? Hell yeah invite him over!
He's just been a dick since he set his face on fire. I just wanted to eat a fucking hot dog.
She slapped a big dramatic bandage on my arm and people started buying me drinks...I plan on wearing a full body cast tomorrow night.
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