just walked out of chelsea's house and saw cameron slapping his dick against her car. cant even make this shit up if i tried.
I wonder if u can grow weed on Framville and sell it to Mafia Wars?
Just got a event reminder on my phone to never party with you again.
so far we have 6 big wheels and 10 boxes of wine for the tour de franzia. team drunkslut is favored to win the yellow jersey.
I just remembered that he had fake blood all over his face last night. I woke up with it all over my dick. He was 50. Please don't judge me.
So Monday we're lesbians.
Deal. This decision is final and any rebates on this will result in losing an eyeball.
I would let Bear Grills repel down a waterfall using my dick if I could go to sleep right now.
I'll be there in 10. I need you naked and ready. Warm up.
It's hard to judge what a reasonable amount of cereal looks like in the spaghetti pot. We're out of cap'n crunch and milk.
he pushed me in the lake knowing full well I had joints on me. that's drug-abuse!!
I have a spatula mark on my ass. He spanked me with a spatula. Take that Rachel Ray.
In a few weeks I'll be a beautiful butterfly and me and my cat will have to repopulate the earth. WE WILL REBUILD!!
I'm wearing men's underwear
I don't know what to do with that information...
So this ukranian guy got angry and took his clothes off. Now he has my credit card and I can't find my keys.
According to the office gossip the new secretary is “a homewrecking whore”. Think I should spend $27 on a fake wedding ring?
Yes! Want that picture of you and my nephew?
Randomize
