you would think someone who fights for his country could fight to last longer than 2 minutes
My google history shows every combination of "red lobster cheesy biscuits" possible.
She just did a bodyshot off herself. I don't care that it's only seven thirty, come pick her up.
I'm spoon feeding myself tequila for breakfast, should we skip class today?
he told me while inside me and mid thrust that he's dreamed of that moment since high school... awkward
The only thing you accomplished yesterday was dry humping me on the floor of my work place WHILE I was working.
Worst decision of artistic career thus far: bringing a banana to eat on male model day.
Did copperhead road at the bar. All the girl next to me did was stare at my glorious bouncing tits. CAN I FUCKING HELP YOU?? I worked hard for these tits.
Who showers for four hours?!
It was like a tropical nap.
He just snapchatted me a picture of his cock. The angle makes it look like a freakin skyscraper. Thinking of photoshopping a little monkey on it.
Just try not to burn your pubes off with sparklers this year.
No promises
Spider-Man is making out with Wonder Woman while Captain Kirk feels up Princess Lea. Nice to see nerd barriers broken down at Comic Con.
I WAS KIDDING ABOUT SLUTEMBER BUT ITS ACTUALLY HAPPENING
Stay strong! Remember we're too uncoordinated to be strippers to make money instead of being a nurse
Yeah so then I used the selfie stick his mom gave me to take nudes
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