Is it bad that Pitbull has taught me more Spanish than high school did?
thanks for celebrating my birthday so severely 2 years ago. i just found your hospital discharge papers in my closet.
anything for my little brother.
On a lighter note, the guy I gave a lap dance to then fell asleep on his crotch just facebook friend requested me..
Luckily my prof thought I was puking from nerves and gave me motivational mini speeches the entire final.
So I think before Superbowl weekend begins we should all take a look back on last year and learn from our pitfalls... AKA no touchdown shots and kitchen crying.
Nice just gets you lonely or dead. I don't like those options.
OH AND DAN PET MY CAT WHILE I WAS GIVING HIM HEAD
You walked up to me, grabbed my face and said "I just peed in the sink!"
my suitemate came in my room last night and flashed me. and then she just walked away. deff transferred to the right school
I woke up with "To whom it may concern" sharpied on my dick
I think I had sex with a seagull last night. The window is open and there a feathers everywhere.
I've got a bottle of water, a bag of salad greens, and a bottle of hot sauce. How stoned do you think I am?
The Lion King Is on YouTube
Until 2 minutes ago I actually had a chance to pass my midterms... thanks alot
sorry bout the carpet, but you DID call it "blackout punch" not "don't vom on my floor punch"
My sister can't give you a handjob and us still be bros.
Randomize