I'm the only one here who isn't hooking up, coming out of the closet, or crying because of one of those 2 things.
her vagina looked like bernie madoff
She has no definite jawline and all of her photo's have Ke$ha quotes as captions followed by a "<3" Even by your standards that is embarrassing.
It's Christmas week. I wouldn't know what to do if i wasn't hung over.
Just found cake in my bra, debating if I should eat it
As shirtless as possible
Dont forget the glove box taco bell stash i saved for drunk us.
Idk. Each time I ask him about double teaming a woman with Dennis Rodman he just giggles. We will never know what to believe.
If you ever bitch out on 72oz margarita night again, this friendship is over
There is always the bar, but 2 30 on a Tuesday just screams alcoholism
This is the third year in a row that Mario has fallen through a table on New Years. I'm sensing a tradition developing.
I got so drunk last night I took a ice bath with my mother in law
I let my daughters ex boyfriend take me home from the bar. Hey, at least he's old enough to drink
It's a sad day when a deadly hurricane headed your way is less depressing than your relationship status.
we've talked on the toilet we're linked now
Randomize
