I got everything I ever gave her back, every picture, and money for the dog. I didn't want it she brought it all back and gave it to me. clothes jackets, pictures, dried flowers, ear rings, necklace...
Sell it on ebay and let's go to the bar
Your an asshole
Actually, it's "you're an asshole"
My point exactly
i googled "the goonies drinking game." i may be alone, but i'm living the college dream.
does my mom think that having an ed hardy lighter is going to get her laid?
just had to shower sitting down. i hope this isn't an indicator of how the rest of my week is going to go.
There was a time I was reining queen of Sunday funday... And at that same time I also weighed 20 pounds more, had the morale of a spearmint rhino stripper, and woke up most mornings asking more questions than fucking Barbara Walters. I think I just wrote my own epitaph.
I think were only still together so we can make each other miserable
I couldn't break up with him while I was wearing a Hakuna Matata shirt.
He fucked me while wearing his night time breathing machine mask. Does this mean I joined the dark side and he is Darth Vader?
You tore a poster off a lamppost and ATE IT. That drunk.
We need to know if his feet match his cock.
is it sad that a disney movie is making me horny?
He was about to go in...and he fell off the bed. Ruined mood!
I might be getting fired on this week so the only option i see for tonight is to get smashed and have an orgy. actually this idea might explain why i'm not an ideal employee.
Our livers get a hall pass for 2020, right?
Randomize
