addddeeerrraaaallll.
ok i'm not sure if that was a success statement or a cry for help.
FUCK TREES I CLIMB BUOYS MOTHERFUCKER
STOP listening to that song
you were so high you were expressing yourself in action figures
did that guy on the oscars really just tell me to text a dolphin?
I love you, but you should know I'll always ditch you for weed.
Why did my little sister call me from your phone this morning?
Things like this can't be explained over text man
just saw sorostitutes streaking near the university president's house. thank you tequila day
Milk that cash cow for all the shots she's worth
I'm doing running of the bulls tomorrow at 7am...except in New Orleans roller derby girls chase you.
I just found a piece of squished oatmeal cream pie in my armpit. So very sad.
He whispered "Are you feeling it now Mr. Krabs?" when he was inside me. That is NOT my fetish.
I was so high last night I honestly think my tears were medicinal
"suitors" is just a nice way of her saying "the guys i'm fucking"
I'm good. But Nutella doesn't taste as good as it used to.
all I remember is screming at her "I want you and your tortillas... DEAD"
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