She said as long as i don't wake her up she doesn't care what hole i use.
Got yourself a keeper right there.
YOU CAN MICROWAVE POPTARTS!?!??!
Ive either hit rock bottom or become my own hero.
He came over while I was in the ER and hung pictures of himself around my house.
Dude she threw his clothes out n 8th floor window and her dog tried to bite his dick off. So the answer is yes it could be worse...
just had to explain to the health center why i wanted 50 condoms a month.
Listen, everyone has a price and mine is free taco bell.
Two hot shots of tequila for breakfast? Yeah today is gonna be a shit show
Well his ex just grabbed his dick and told him yep Ill call u later
Don't feel sorry for me. I'm getting Red Lobster and sex tonight. Nothing can bring me too far down.
She's high and running across rooftops. Yes we're going to end up in A&E again.
its like my brain is a tree and you are those little cookie elves
like I licked Molly off a boys palm last night at a bar I think its ok to eat chicken once a week
I think I just got buffalo sauce on my penis. Is that a turn on or off?
That was my first party and they were so suprised that this little freshman girl was a FUCKING BEER PONG QUEEN.
Randomize
