oh. my. god. the guy i hooked up with last night is currently wearing a dress.
dude i just saw a topless girl trying to get into her locked car. im moving here
20 yrs from now I just want to barge in her house and yell at her kids, "I took ur moms virginity!"
i really should have bought real food rather than condoms, olives, coleslaw and beer...
her boyfriend dumped her for my exgirlfriend. so filming our hookup is pretty much a definite.
Did we literally take a cab across the street
I legit had to pull him off my car. Then he texted me saying 'take me places.' Shotgun getting that drunk tonight
At one point in time, he cried and said I didn't appreciate him.
No sex in the champagne room. The champagne room being my life
My throw up tasted like pumpkin, fall is right around the corner.
I am watching xfiles and eating microwaved cookiedough, and I see nothing wrong with it.
The sorting hat of life was not kind to you.....
Haha do not judge my life style choices right now but me and Dj had sex twice and then he helped me pick an outfit out for my date
All I remember is being in the middle of the road puking and my bestfriend cheering me on from the passenger seat...
Just woke up beside some twink in a kilt.. how is your sunday going
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