Could you imagine if a Skynet machine combination of Bob Ross and Chuck Norris were built? It would rule the universe with a soft spoken fan brush of kung fu dominance
It would be truly incredible. I hope we are blessed with this being in our lifetime.
Are you okay?
Don't worry. Self-respect preserved. My speech was Grey's quality... I made him cry.
Anything crazier than usual happen? I woke up in a stairway with my cock out.
I heard you threw up in your lap?
I heard that too.
When we made out her lip\nose ring fell out in my mouth. Awkward?
Just walk-of-shame'd past fifteen little girls at summer camp. Take a good look girls, I am you in twelve years.
When I woke up I had three missed calls from the name 'dream krystals'.... If I remember correctly she was the lady at the drive thru at Krystals and her name was Dream.. She wanted to come to the strip club with us... Do you remember?
He was going down on me and raised up for a minute, slipped and punched me in the face. My lady boner left immediately.
you do realize that we pretended we were worms for like 10 minutes and inched around on the ground, don't you?
She gave me head while using a laptop on my stomach to go online. I've never seen a better feat of multitasking.
I wish a box of wine came w a hose. It'd be so much easier to drink from.
Don't mind the bowl full of ashes in the sink. I meant to set that on fire.
I don't know but this 12 year old kid is soaking up all of our bad morals like a super tampon on the second day of my period
Remember that guy I fucked last month? Well I'm watching his dog this weekend while he's in the Bahamas with his girlfriend. What is my life
He listens to me complain and in return I send him naked pictures. It's a win win situation
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