you want me
i'd rather choke on a dick.
Yeah true. Damn vaginas. They're ruining the world.
Yes, I did know where her mouth had been, but frankly I think it was a lesson you needed to learn.
please promise me that no matter what happens you will keep me away from the children
I dont feel as bad coming home this baked because I gave my 14 year old sister a no drugs talk last night.
She's currently celebrating her completion of "Sober October" with "Margarita Shit-Show November."
Dude, I checked into a cathedral... I thought it was a joke, until I found a candle and a whole bunch of coins in my purse
A nice make out session never hurt anyone. Plus he's a pilot, so he'll know the safety procedures for when the night crashes and burns.
What's the address and code again...does anyone need anything and why is my viking helmet on the bed?
Remember when you walked in on me sleeping INSIDE a pillowcase?
i came outside and he was eating her out on my lawn. i refuse to pick up the dog shit in my yard so i hope he chose the spot wisely
Once he bit me I drew the fucking line.
Taking body shots off hot Camren. Get here now.
I just walked in on her masturbating to a social anxiety video...
He howled at the moon then told me that if i were a dog he'd have sex with me...either i look like that girl or i need to stop going on blind dates. Period.
Randomize