im surounded by vag. Like smog aound LA, i am suffocating in an atmosphere of pussy
Just met a guy who has been in college for 7 years and still classified as a junior. Then watched him shotgun 10 beers. Found my new hero
just apologized to a random stranger while waiting in line for coffee. last night was that drunk
we turned studying into a drinking game, she drinks when she gets it right, i drink when she gets it wrong. so we'll be out soon
his profile picture is a blurry one of him holding a beer. i recognized him instantly.
quit making up holidays to get me to go drinking with you
He made off the wall shots in beer pong, stuck the girls dog in a cooler, and played with swords with her mom. I wish I got his name
What's great about college is that i can eat chocolate cereal for every meal and call it a money saving technique.
QUIT RUINING DICK PICTURE DAY
Hey nothing wrong with those! I can't believe the guys who let me see where they live on first dates. Even more surprising, I don't stalk them after they've done me wrong.
Well the term Party is used loosely in this situation. Since it will just be mom wine drunk and us eating chips with multiple dips.
I need vitamin water and Jesus :/
Alvin just won tickets on the radio. I guess he's out of jail.
He's going to wonder why I have burn marks on my asshole
Apparently karate chopping the fronts off all the paper towel and soap dispensers in the bathrooms isn't even frowned upon. Like even at the third bar when I fell flat on my back trying to jump kick the last one some guy just helped me up and high fived me. America.
Randomize
