i nerd-gasmd. plain and simple.
I get drunk and say inappropriate things... you get drunk and sleep with inappropriate people. it's what we do.
This is ridiculous. It's like playing possible STD Clue, and I don't want to be the winner.
there are ass prints on the hood of my car.
at what point last night did we decide it was okay to let me hitch hike to another bar?
Oh God! I'm naked from the waist down playing records. Too drunk. I don't even know what to do.
Balls out but with a shirt on. Eating ravioli. I don't know how to deal with this.
I just want to know who nailed the chicken nugget to the door.
I'm staying in tonight, it's my Christmas present to my liver.
don't pay it forward
I eont pay shit forward. told a stranger to call an abulance and peaced
I just try to date guys based on what I need like I am trying to find an electrician now
You gays are geniuses
oh btw ur so lucky i got stoned and passed out or we sooo would have bedazzled your dick while you slept. just sayin.
So apparently I was a completely different person lastnight, one who drinks scotch and makes out with 55 year old men who look like inspector gadget
Well that's disappointing. I guess I'll give a lesson on dick-breaking another time then
We laughed, we cried, we fucked, we shirked our familial and work related responsibilities. They could make a movie about the last 40 hours of our lives.
Visiting my great uncle went well. The highlight of the evening was when he said, "Oh my god. I'm 79 and I'm teaching 18 year old kids how to roll a joint."
Randomize
