can't believe I ate straight coffee grounds to stay awake for that
right. well i dont plan on getting laid till i find a respectable girl that i can make unrespectable
Transgendered man at work dawning a slutty batman costume. I hate Halloween
thats the sluttiest christmas spirit ever.
Theres an amvulance here. It might be for me
Do you think if I puke at the gym they think is because I'm going hard walking on the treadmill?
you kept telling us that in dog beers you only had one
You were pretty dunk by the time you introduced the vase as your best friend.
she kept yelling about wanting tacos, so I gave her a piece of bologna in a tortilla. she didn't know the difference
For the amount of money I just spent on my dogs toe, I could have fucked the entire B squad at a low end strip club.
Februarys looking very promising in the vaginal department
I think that's the key to being an adult though... Get those rapid fire beer shits out I the way early, then you can go about your grown man business
That's what you get for dating construction workers you meet in tunnels.
So a bottle of lube exploded all over my softball bag and Nike shirt.
I’m vetoing meatball margaritas right out the gate. We can’t have people throwing up again!
Randomize
