just wrote on a church. and then stalked a boy, by the way, i fucked him. him being your friend, also, love tacos.
Totally smoking with fifteen year olds.
I'm almost 25, which means I can ride with girls that have permits
ugh.. my birth control just came out of my nose. wtf?
i wanna make it FB official so he cant fuck anyone else. but that means i can't fuck anyone else either. CONUNDRUM
he was so excited that he found the elusive clitoris. i was like look christopher colombus, just because you found it doesnt mean you knew what to do with it
In the middle of blowin me she stoppped and told me how easy it would be to insert a catheter ..... Apparently she was a nursing major
He walked in, tore open the drawer, pulled out a condom, and slammed it shut. He was that ready.
A French guy bit my cheek. Is that sexy there? Also had to threaten to stab the bus driver. I'm not sure I like Europe.
i'm having taco bell mild sauce and tums for breakfast because i'm hungover and thats all i can find. it's like thanksgiving up in here
The only thing keeping me calm right now is pretending to chop off everyone's heads when using the paper cutter
Yea we just broke up
so do we start sexting now or later?
Let's try finding a bar where there aren't people who want to hang me from a tree by my nutsack
Well now you know not to take drugs from your friends. Take it from stangers. They're more reliable.
Its one thing to reject me, but to reject me AND my hottest friend AT THE SAME TIME!?!?
Randomize
