your room smells of hookers.
And success
you were watching a documentary about sharks and wouldn't stop stroking my legs and whispering "what if they could walk?"
I can hear her blowing you man. All I hear is her saying 'yeah' over and over again.
Omg 230 lb butch lesbian with a mustache grabbed my dick. I need an adult
Seriously, dude... You knows its bad when you gag on her nipple.
It's only Tuesday and I just measured and checked to see if my 6'5 Friday booty call will fit in the back of my jeep comfortably.
there is a guy passed out on top of me and i don't know what to do. help if you're awake? was anyone anyone expecting someone? maybe he found the wrong room?
Unless you're gonna start buying my underwear, you have got to stop ripping it off of me.
It's titled "A countdown to death. A psychological look at the downward spiral of actress Lindsay Lohan and her inevitable Hollywood demise" This dissertation is genius. Not a single sober moment for either Lindsay or myself. Good stuff!
Why am I the only one golf clapping for the vomiting girl on the train who just fell of her seat into her own vomit
She tried to gratify me left handed. Let's just say I've been placed on the 15 day DL.
Jesus Christ. Even your cock has to be an overachiever. :-(
I'm determined to sit on that face.
The 666th photo in my phone is of him and if that's not a sign that he's secretly the Antichrist, idk what is. Also, bring more rum.
Dude i just passed out while getting head...she cried
Randomize
