I can no longer count the number of girls I've banged on my fingers and toes. It's like being born again.
It's American, baby! There ain't nothin gross about America.
You know your from las vegas when the girl on the stage in the strip club was in my US gov class senior year
Apparently faking a threesome isn't as much fun as you'd think
im pretty sure this vending machine only exists when im drunk
she was eating donuts out of the garbage. enough said.
you're avoiding the subject, i want to know how you ended up at the strip club with the dog, fucker
You declared war on your ex and then had sex with who you thought was her sister. No one knows who she was but we think your dick might be in danger.
Its a sick, sad, world when parents get more ass then you.
Is valentines day the worst or best day to ask for a threesome? I'm weighing some options on this high-risk manoeuvre.
FYI: Brian said he left me in the bathroom Friday night to shower and 45 minutes later found me with a towel around my head, my pants on and holding my boobs. No more Jell-O shots for me.
Why do I feel like I need to drink to feel better about the things I do when I'm drunk
What happened last night and why am I partially covered in queso?
Basically I think I'm replacing men/sex with theme parks.
Sorry I blacked out in bed
it was real late and you were brushing your teeth with miller light. it was bound to happen.
Randomize
