I'm at the point in my career when i know a sites a trap and isn't real porn
I had another sleeping on concrete incident.
It's nice to sit in the library and see the progression from freshman pledge to 6th year coke addict all at one table. Gotta love sororities
You kept screaming "Its taco night!" before every shot
now that we've slept with the entire soccer team i think its time to expand the horizon.
That's right. If she can't abide by the rules then she gets booted. It's like survivor booty call edition
I like the odds of his and my children being professional athletes too. To support me in my old age, see I do think about the future.
youre always welcome to strip dance on tables with me Mag. what are friends for.
He won't let me go to the bars unless I can manage to get flip flops on.
Sounds like he's doing this for your own good...
Oh yeah, found out i got it from my boyfriend's wife. Thanks though.
Why do I have the 4 of hearts in my bra?
Haha we got sick of drinking on 4 is for whores so we stole the cards...I woke up with three of them in mine
drunken problem solving at its finest
My synapses wont fire in a pattern that will process those facts
Just taxi'd to the airport holding a zip lock bag of my own vomit. Bachelorette success.
If you're with any of them tell them i apologize for (insert whatever i did here)
I just bought two cartons of ice cream, 5 boxes of mac and cheese and a bridal magazine. Don't judge me.
Randomize