But i just feel like he will pull it out and ill panic. I mean its fairly basic. Up and down. But i feel like ill just freak out.
well apparently i yelled MY VAGINA WAS ANNIHILATED and his whole family heard
I'm actually pretty neutral about a lot of things. I'm like Switzerland with a penis.
This sounds like "Sober" Ericka. Sorry that message wasn't for you. I only do business with "Fell off the wagon" Ericka. Please pass that message along to her.
dont worry, it'll just be a conversation starter like "why did you get that pierced?" or "wow, i got arrested there too"
You brought us all personal gifts you had stolen from the party and bellowed "hoes hoes hoes, clepto Santa loves you"
I might come over. Something about you makes me matronly and I have this urge to nurse you back to health with soup and a blowjob
Fortunately for myself I'm twice as smart and half as drunk as everyone else. All things considered I'm leaving here three-to-five times richer than when I arrived.
i want to go make food but i'll have to face my mom after telling her that the random i'm sleeping with, whose name i don't know, told me I was "too slutty to be his girlfriend" when i was drunk last night
While you wait, fill out your state patrol application. Not trying to be your mom, I just really want to fuck a cop.
We got naked and peed in the garden. Something about bonding with our new house
Something about being drunk at 1pm chasing seagulls on the beach while it's raining is very calming
Come on down you're the next contestant on "lets go drinking!"
Hey sorry for calling you so much last night. I mixed your number with the pizza guys, and he was running late
sweet Jesus, who thought 13 martinis was a good idea? 11 was probably sufficient.
Randomize
