i hope thats the last time i ever see ryan's hairy ass fucking
what i wouldnt give for a night at orourkes without seeing 3+people ive slept with
In debating whether or not it's worth getting out of bed and walking 5 feet down the hallway to go to the bathroom before I puke
Wedding update: no alcohol, 75% of people have left, no one is dancing, no single groomsmen, and it's 5:30. I'm going the fuck home to drink by myself.
They thought "watering it down" meant adding more vodka
Sorry for my penis texting you last night, I can't control what he wants at 4am.
just tried to puke while my RA was trying to puke in the stall next to me.bonded for life
Please God, is a penis possibly making it to vagina town to much to ask for tonight.
I have been referring to it as "thanks for getting out of me day" all week. Do you think they will still take me to brunch tomorrow?
No sex in the champagne room. The champagne room being my life
If it's any consolation, I made really strong brownies yesterday and had 3 and then I saw demons
I tried to avoid catching feelings but then he took me out to breakfast
you made it your goal to puke in every planter around the union. you got most of them. im proud of you
btw...it's noon and i'm sitting here drinking wine and eating pixie stix. I really need to find something to do...
only i would get cock blocked by a cop
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