Still drunk and leading the team through the 9am sales meeting. I'm pretty sure this is why there aren't more 26year-olds in management.
i forgot what you looked like. so we left to get pizza. sorry
PS: the photo I uploaded for this internship site is the same one i used for my fake ID. I like to keep it classy.
hooked up with a girl who spoke elfish last night..what up 8th grade lord of the rings fantasies
She told me that as long as she kept starring at the freckle on her arm she wouldnt throw up
In less than 3 minutes we had 3 security guards running after us
Did you leave a blizzard on my porch last night? Or was that someone else giving out a metaphorical threat to me?
Can we play rock paper scissor shot again? I want to black out in 15 minutes or less...
two questions - what stuff of mine was pawned and who has the pawn tickets.
My therapist thinks I shld paint u something to show u my appreciation 4 ur friendship. 1) she must think I'm rite on the brink of no friends 2) this is real
Tomorrow I need you to slap me in the face. I'll explain then
There's glitter all over his bed from my Pink VS panties... I think I might invest in similar styles as a way of marking my territory just incase.
I just woke up in his bed.. in a cardboard castle, with a Justin Bieber poster on the ceiling staring down at me, cuddling with 4 empty PBR cans. I win.
The bar brought brought it upon themselves, they played billy joels piano man before closing, it's not our fault the bar isn't a bar anymore, right?
If I told the doordash driver it's national nudity day, think he'd still report me for being topless at the door?
Randomize
