I wish facebook had a fuck off button.
Grandma was not a fan of the beer-can ornaments. Not "traditional".
Do the low cut shirt test. If he stares at your tits even in front of your brother, he's down.
yeah, and when i walked in on them fucking he said "go away, i'm making sons."
Do you know how hard it is to write about pediatric crohn's when we're trying to figure out the keg situation for graduation?
I always knew I'd be the first one with an STD
I CAN'T DO THIS MUCH FABULOUS BEFORE LUNCHTIME
I just tried to make cleaning gasoline off your shoes with toilet paper in the Chemistry Building bathroom look normal. I failed.
New drink: empty coke can vodka water maple syrup. Get on my level
Well she described you as a "Sex-Viking", which seemed to be only slightly related to the red beard. So things are looking good!
I AM HANGING OUT WITH ADORABLE DOGS SURROUNDED BY NATURE. GOD BLESS AMERICA AND ALSO BYE CIVILIZATION AND PANTS.
Are you at a park?
Life goal: sit on his perfect beautiful David Archuleta-lookalike face
she compared me favorably to her vibrator
which one?
I'm drinking because I just started here and every single person I work with wants to quit and when I asked a coworker how she's doing she literally just started crying.
I think I accidentally got a sugar daddy but I was already planning on sleeping with him so I’m going to see where this goes
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