I want my own midget army. I think I would be a good midget army leader.
eating raw peppers to burn the taste of semen out of my mouth
even in my darkest moments, having another person eat my jizz would make me smile
Mac n' cheese is coming out of my nose. You can't make that feel better
This girl just stopped in the middle of a sentence because of my blue eyes. She said she got lost in them. I am laying pipe tonight.
I keep waking up with the nagging feeling I gave him half a hand job through his shorts.
He puked in the funnel and continued to chug it. Who is this dude?
hotdog in my bra and i still managed to score. Got a bit freaked when he tried to eat it though. I paid 3 bucks for that fucking hotdog.
I saw Nicolas Cage's face in the moon. Those were good shrooms.
posting about faith hill is really not helping you get me into your bed
Oh and someone pissed in my shoes, so I'll let you figure that out.
Do you remember our dinosaur noises from last night ? Breaaaahhhhhppp
Fuck these runners passing me on campus as I'm waking to dinner. With my huggie. With flavored vodka and rum. Aka yum
I had a drink called "the white nun." It tasted like Marshmallows, and celibacy.
You bet your firm but soft ass I miss you
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