My mom foundout about my dui nd just called me to come home. I just took acid like 30 min ago. Wht should i do?
I drank enough to make her look pretty . . It worked and i threw up while going at it
i just posted a lake picture of you with a dead fish in your mouth. happy july 5th.
do you think they make "congratulations unfit mother" greeting cards?
or abortion recommendation cards.
I want to drop kick Stephanie Meyer
you spelled her name wrong
not you too!!
It's gotten to the point where even copying off yahoo answers is still way too much work.
He just slept in my bed for a couple hours and asked lots of questions about gay sex. No, I do not have his number.
I'm just saying, margarita tuesday would turn anyone gay.
I made this pact with my vagina, though. No more heartless fuckery.
Yes but from my experience being high around your own baby makes you feel like the worst kind of mom
he said he needs a little more pabst, some time to jack off and a sandwich and he'll be ready
Being drunk isn't an excuse for eating all of the bacon asshole
He's mad about lube? You know what, don't even. I'm not in the proper mindset to discuss lube.
I would also like you to tell your human bio class that I successfully smoked out the flu. 103 degree when I woke up yesterday. 100degree after one bowl. 4 more bowls and 16 hours later all that's left is a cough
Afterwards the first thing I said was, "You know, you're probably the first guy who has ever gotten laid wearing Star Wars pajama bottoms."
Randomize
